Remember how Gene Wilder played Willy Wonka in the sixties? He acted like a perpetual jester-on-methaphetamenes, jumping, hopping, skipping and singing, even when things were dangerous and little girls fell down squirrel holes. That's what my climbing instructor Mr. Kim is like. Dave, Callie and I were the only members of our thirty plus member club asked to join the climbing team leaders on this past Saturday's climb. This is because the climb we went on was ridicuously dangerous and as Mr. Kim subtly put it,
"If others join us, they maybe die because climb is too hard".
Instead of being scared or nervous like a normal person, I was stupidly excited and honored to be asked. Dave, Callie, and I strapped ourselves into harnesses and had an hour long lesson where we worked on our boldering and rappeling skills. The practice and lesson was intense, but it was nothing when compared with the actual climb. We bouldered up a four hundred meter high ninety degree incline. I started this journey like a pro, reaching for each foothold like I had been doing this for years. Then, halfway through the hike, I found myself clinging to the rockface, death gripping a small tree, and saying things to myself like "please God let me live through this". Even more traumatizing was the extent of Mr. Kim's positive attitude. He was reenacting musical theatre for us on the mountain. He danced and made bad jokes, mocked our fear, and showed us how to perfect the "no hands" rappeling move.
It was beautiful, crazy, and scary day. Very Wonkaesque.
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